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We have all lost jobs, lost clients, and lost money in our lives, whether we are in business for ourselves yet or not, and it can be super painful and scary when that happens, not just for the obvious reasons, but because when “endings” happen in our lives, in any way, shape or form, it brings up ALL THE OTHER ENDINGS in our lives and our past wounding around those endings, if it hasn’t been fully resolved.
I wrote the below post at the beginning of the pandemic, but it’s something that applies every single time we lose anything that gave a sense of security.
So here are my suggestions for what to do when you lose a job, client or money, or anything that gave you a sense of security: (you might want to save or bookmark this post to come back to if or when you need it)
1. Let Yourself Grieve:
Cry, scream, punch pillows, sob to a friend, do what you need to do to move the energy and move through the stages, and move that energy through your body in any way you like or see fit, just make sure it moves.
the more you fight, run, freeze or hang on, the worse it feels. After you’ve grieved it out, bring acceptance of the current situation, but stay absolutely out of future-izing. Calm your nervous system. It will be in fight, flight and freeze to try to protect you but we can’t think clearly when we’re in those modes, so anything and everything you can do to calm yourself will help. We’re talking radical presence here, one breath at a time. Ground yourself in the present. Deep breaths, long walks, lots of self-tenderness and care.
3. Get Absolutely Honest:
I know it’s hard but try and muster the courage to ask yourself if there was ANY part of you deep down that wanted to let go of this thing, or this way. If there was any small quiet wisdom within that you’d been ignoring because you simply couldn’t see another way. Your mind may buck-back and say “NO! I was about to breakthrough and now THIS!” and I encourage you to ask yourself: “what if this IS the breakthrough?”
4. Shift From Outside-In to Inside-Out:
One of the golden opportunities and gifts of the pandemic was to see that it took the so-called solid places OUTSIDE of us that we placed our trust and faith in, and it shook all that to the core in such a way that it was impossible to ignore. Showing us all beyond a shadow of a doubt that the “all your safety, security and power is outside of you, and you must hustle to earn it and prove your worth to keep it” model of life is a total mirage. Which means we are now being given a chance to anchor WITHIN ourselves, and to start truly knowing that it was our FREEDOM that made our money and success, NOT the other way around.
5. Remember Life Is A Spiral Not A Line:
It is tempting to believe that your trajectory is a linear graph and that this appears to be a giant step backwards, but life is a spiral not a line! And the biggest wins of your life could be just around the corner in a way you simply cannot see yet, and a lot closer than you think.
6. Become A Receiver:
You have likely been taking the world on your shoulders all of your life, giving and giving, taking care of so much, and now, with everything out of your hands like this, there is really only one option left: lean into trust and faith like your life depends on it, and let yourself be held and supported for once. When you can’t see what you can possibly do, and you can’t do all the things, you have to let all the things be done. Surrender into the flow. Ask “how can I receive everything I need?” and let go. The answer will come to you when you are open. And it may come in the most delightful and unexpected ways.
7. Open Your Heart & Mind:
It is so easy to close, to retract into feelings of fear, shame or worry that this is some kind of punishment. It is not. Open your heart to the gifts that this is bringing you. Commit to actively looking for them. This will save your life, and it will open the door to a flow of gifts that will expand from your attention to them.
8. Hold Your Dreams Closer, Not Further Away:
Write, visualize and feel into your dreams more than ever, not less! In times like these it is tempting to think dreams are a luxury you don’t have, but that couldn’t be further from the truth! Times like these are a preparation of the ground, they are a fresh slate to spring up new shoots. Don’t you EVER stop dreaming, not in your darkest hour, not ever. This is only the beginning for you. You’ll see.
9. Choose Love Instead of Fear:
Fear is a contagion the power of which is far greater than anything in this world… except LOVE. As much as is possible, consciously decide to choose love over fear and become absolutely VIGILANT that any and all choices you make right now regarding your livelihood and dreams are not purely fear based decisions. If you don’t know how, stay in trust, and repeat step six. Stay the course, change the course, re-create the course, but don’t throw the course in the garbage.
10. Ask For Guidance:
I like to consult my wiser self, my higher self, my heart and my soul, in my journal. But do what works for you. Ask your angels, ask your guides, ask someone you trust and whom is carrying an energy you would like to carry through this. Don’t ask people in fear obviously. Ask someone or something who can see beyond the horizon. This is a powerful time for your inner visionary to emerge.
11. Trust Yourself:
Trust the guidance that comes in the form of your intuition and insights. Trust your deeper knowing. The voice that gets buried under panic, the quiet one that knows. That one. The one that has led you to the most amazing places and landscapes you hadn’t dreamed. That is the inner guide you want to follow. Not the one that’s screaming running around with their hair on fire. 😅😂
12. Be The Flow:
The river of life is flowing, and we can fight it or move with the stream. Of course this is ridiculous because we ARE the stream, but most of the time we don’t know this. Now is the time to relax into the flow. Soften into the flow and feel its power as it moves through you. You cannot put this river in a cup and put it in your cupboard for all time (in the form of a job, client or money). But you don’t need to. You are the river. And the river fills ALLLLLL the cups. ❤️💗💖🥰
And if you’d like some help getting through, I’m your girl: ✨