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You are always spending money on what matters to you the most. You are voting for your values with every dollar you spend, at all times (this is with the assumption of what is above your basic survival needs of course). But knowing this, and noticing this, will empower you and help you to reclaim your choices, and validate your own choices, and take them out of the “right/wrong/good/bad” inner battle which is never-ending and totally un-winnable and really frustrating! Trying to justify and make them right or wrong or good or bad instead of just recognizing that they are your values.
So for example: I value beauty, and growth, and discovery and self-discovery… I value pleasure and delight… I value joy… I value laughter… I value freedom… I value creative expression… I value challenging myself to new goals and dreams… I value breaking barriers… I value the NEW and FRESH… I value art and creativity… and so all of my money, beyond my basic survival needs, gets spent on those things.
And as someone who notices things a LOT and has a very heightened sense of observation, I find it fascinating to witness the stories we humans tell ourselves around this.
I will watch people say they do not have the money for this that or the other and then spend that exact amount on whatever it is that IS more important to them in that moment. Maybe it’s beer and cigarettes, maybe it’s health food, maybe it’s travel, maybe it’s a cute outfit, maybe it’s knick-knacks at the antique fair, maybe it’s makeup, maybe it’s wine, maybe it’s a course or class, maybe it’s a road trip, maybe it’s tacos, it could be anything and everything!
But the thing is YOU DON’T HAVE TO JUDGE YOURSELF FOR THAT! It’s actually super empowering to just notice what you value, right now, and OWN IT. And just be like “yah, right now I am valuing tacos more X.” (whatever you think you should be spending on instead). “That’s just what I want and value more right now!”
And maybe you can even see WHY and what that’s giving you and why that’s so important to you and it might reveal something you never really saw before, it could be really revealing!
Instead, most people feel secret SHAME for the ways they spend their money, and so they have learned, by watching how society works, to ‘explain/blame’ away the shame. We externalize that by complaining about the prices of things, gasping at cost, saying “I can’t afford that” when possibly (not always but possibly) you can but are just choosing not to, or are something else in that moment.
And THAT’S YOUR RIGHT! That’s your power at work!
Now I am talking about the things above the ‘safety’ level, because of course most of us will prioritize safety first, but it is interesting to notice that often we do NOT value safety ABOVE our other values. We also value challenge, we value risk, we value freedom, we value our ability to choose what we want, we value our sovereignty, we value our personal power, we value charting new territory, we value comfort, we value distraction, we value entertainment, we value beauty, we value so many things right along side of our safety, and isn’t that just fascinating to notice?
So, today’s post is short, but I invite you to think about, talk about, or journal about what it is that YOU value the most and what you spend your money on that shows that you value those things the most, it can be quite an illuminating exercise! And whatever you find there, don’t judge yourself for it, just look at it with wonder like “Oh wow! so THAT’S so interesting, that’s what I am valuing right now, that’s amazing to notice about myself right now. Cool.”
It’s not a problem unless you make it into a problem, and it can work FOR YOU instead of AGAINST YOU when you are just clear and in full empowered ownership of who you are in the moment, knowing that is a changeable thing if you want, but doesn’t have to change if you don’t want, and it can be any way you want it to be… because it’s your life. Your “one precious life”, as Mary Oliver said.
When I got clear on that, and just owned who I am and what I value and how I spend, it really aligned and empowered my money flow, and got my money working for me in my life for the things that really matter to ME (maybe not to others but to me, instead of some image I have in my mind of who I am supposed to be).
And I know it will do the same for you too, when you pause and have a look. It gets you in agreement with yourself and when you are in agreement with yourself, you’re unstoppable. ❤️
It’s important to note as well that the etymology of the word spending is from old english “to use up” or “deprive oneself of”, isn’t that interesting, and I just want to point out that is not true at all in the grander pulled back view, money does not truly stop or start anywhere, it CIRCULATES. Just like energy. Just like water. Just like air. It circulates the globe, changing hands, changing places, changing uses, feeding into that flow and being fed by it. Money is just another way life supports our being-ness. So feel free to exchange the word ‘spending’ with ‘circulating’ to help your brain remember that forever moving flow so it doesn’t get stuck in finality.
Have fun exploring your values!
❤️
And if you need help with that, I’ve got lots of lovely roads to explore it in the picture grid below 👇 ✨ pick the one that calls to you most, whatever that is, I’m sure it’s just the one. Everything I do is designed to connect you with what your own version of your most beautiful life is, because that is what I want for me.
xo,
Sunni
